The International Persian Language Testing System ( IPLTS )

I’ve been wondering if Persian was a dominant language around the world, how our writing tasks would be. Since almost all IELTS topics are based on English culture, It would be hilarious to imagine few Persian/Islamic topics.

Task1 General IPLTS

Your local council is considering closing a mosque, in order to open a strip club. Write a letter to your local newspaper. In your letter

  • Give details of how you and your friends use the mosque
  • Explain why the mosque is important to preserve the peace in the neighborhood
  • Describe the perils of a strip club on the youth.

 

Task2 General IPLTS
In your country, the culture of Freedom of speech is dramatically increasing. Describe the negative effects of this trend.
Write at least 500 words.

How a person with native genderless language thinks about English

Today, I accidentally mentioned my girlfriend by “He” pronoun among 15 other students in an English class. My classmates found it a bit funny (not weird), we had laughed for a moment and continued. Because all of us have done it many times during our learning process. I am sure every Persian student have asked themselves once, why any language would have multiple pronouns to differentiate genders? I questioned this because I was too lazy to learn new complexities which I instinctively knew it is not necessary. As always, I stumbled upon the internet to find a few answers and ideas. Despite my first motive, which was laziness, I found that pronouns are already huge arguments among the people.

I have found that the Persian used to be a gendered language until 700 years ago, but for some reasons, literary elites decided to eliminate the extra pronouns from the official language. I’ve also seen few video footage of arguments about the formation of LGBT concepts. For instance, in Dr. Phil reality show, in each LGBT related episodes, calling the right pronouns is highly demanded by participants. Another example is a video of StevenCrowder YouTube channel, once again, the pronouns part is the difficult and often contradictory argument. While I was watching these videos, a curious and confused voice in my head asked why do the gender pronouns exist at all?

As far as I know, in some rare cases, English pronouns gives a little bit of extra information in a single sentence. For example, I would call my pet “He” when it became important and precious to me. But frankly speaking, it’s not really worthwhile to have 3 different pronouns, therefore to form lots of complexities in language including LGBT contradictions. A woman, a man or even a tree can be mentioned with a single pronoun without rising a big drama out of it.

What I felt after I had started learning English, particularly about pronouns, the concept of gender has become more important in my conscious mind, although, it doesn’t affect my behavior at all. But what about native English speakers? (or any other gendered language speakers) Have they ever felt not to pay attention to gender unconsciously? Maybe it would be possible through a process of assimilation, yet it’s a process and will take time and effort. I know my country is far behind the equal rights, especially in the sexual role, but as a person who was lucky enough to not have anyone’s beliefs thrust upon me, I felt the transition from not valuing the gender to paying a slight attention.

 

Another shocking genetic heritage

It is written in a book that we inherit so many different effective aspects of our personality through genes. It seems totally fine with me for inherit small boobs or shiny bald head or getting either high or low IQ. But when it comes to happiness, beloved science really disappointed me. According to studies, the happiness is an inherited characteristic from our parents by the factor of 50%. No matter how perfectly you build your social relations, or if you even deliberately blow up you relations, still there is a guaranteed 50% life satisfaction, waiting for you enjoy with. The number is so quirky that rose series of question in my mind; If your genes decided to be under 50%, does it worth to desperately try being happy? Or if your genes are already above, does it worth to get along with the complexity of social relations?

I always believe that our genes are a kind of prison to our evolution. In this particular era of our natural development, we are too ahead of our natural capacities, furthermore our demands have faced too many changes that our biological abilities cannot deliver effective tools to so we can adjust ourselves with our demands. For example, we can’t live more than 5 secs outside of our planet (as far as been discovered). This is where I expect a revolution from science, especially genetics.

This expectation could regard to the vast variety of needs either simple or complex, although what really caught my attention is whether it is urgent to have the sense of fear. As an intelligence species living in the 21st century, with the domination of an entire planet, do we really still need a sense of fear? Of Corse there are benefits to have a sense of fear, nonetheless, I think there is the faintest trace of drawbacks which needs to be argued. For example, whenever I asked a mild religious friend why do they insist to believe in god, every time we ended up with the fact that there is an uncontrollable fear deep inside certain people who only can be allayed by worshiping something divine. So far, this totally makes sense to me, but when you see results of religion in regions like the middle east, disadvantages of having the sense of fear easily outweigh the merits. Even if this chaos is effects of meddling other countries, still believing in religion seems like a great weakness that can be meddled by others, remotely.

Now, what it has to do with genetics? Well, in most cases, you can’t even argue such an idea with a religious person. I don’t know how but they prefer to keep fighting over their ideology than to sit and have a conversation about whether if it is true at all. But, if they discard the genetic fear, therefore abandon prerequisite of worshiping the god, there wouldn’t remain any reason to fight over.

I knew lots of unforeseen catastrophic trouble would come along with this idea. But, post a comment if you think there are another reasons that we should dump the sense of fear, one way or another, post it below in the comment section.

A promise to “player 1”

I saw a video about whether we are living in a simulation. The three given reasons are overwhelming, yet fictional. Since analyzing theories, even the most inconceivable ones,  are some kind of amusement for me, I’ve decided to write a message to my player or whoever is playing me.

Dear “player 1”

I assume that you are smart enough to have the primary game-pad so I’m calling you “player 1”. Anyhow, you really suck at gaming dude! What the hell is wrong with you? Can’t you just scam another player and get instantly affluent? Dude, I’m not a criminal and you know it but evidently, there is no game-master down here to ban you for fraud. And guess what? others are easily doing it already. So stop being too naive and noob and get your shits together. I don’t want to be mean but If there is any pay-to-win plan, please pay for few peaks which I really need them in a couple of years ahead. I promise you will have an unbelievable experience, a totally unexpected turn of events in the near future. Trust me, nothing will be the same if you deliver a bit of help. You have my word.

I also would like to appreciate what you have been doing in my love life you magnificent beast. Keep it up, you are doing surprisingly good despite the terms of success.

I don’t know if writing this letter was part of the simulation but If you read this feel free to leave comments for me. I would be fun to stay in touch one way or another.

Sincerely

The Comedisian from the game

Judging people based on their foods

I had fast food last night. I’ve missed fast food. Fast food is fun in terms of momentary satisfaction. Of course, traditional food is usually more healthy, it also belongs to boring people with the average quality of married life which, by the way, is not my cup of tea. Venegerian food sound nourishing with magical healing power, yet if you haven’t been mentally hurt so far, why would you even bother yourself to avoid meat. Furthermore, all vegetarians ( no offense ) seem to have been through many fucked up situations and could not find anything or anyone to blame but beef.